I told you I would keep you up on the ideas for the book I'm writing called, Play It Forward. A key concept is that we all have stuff in our lives. It is the accumulation of "life happens." It is a combination of what we've experienced, what we believe and how we think. The stuff of our lives could be likened to a beach ball. Have you ever taken a beach ball into a pool or into the ocean and tried to hold it underwater? You can keep it down but it takes a lot of effort. If stay on top of it you can manage but if you are distracted or the waves move you the ball will pop back to the surface. In a similar way we can stay on top of our stuff if we are playing our A game. But when life gets sideways on us or we get distracted our stuff comes to the surface and sometimes it shoots clear out of the water!
This cycle isn't a new one. Even the heroes of the Bible dealt with their stuff. But we often don't see it because we've romanticized their victories so much we neglect to read between the lines during the conflict. We focus on the end and fortunately in the end there is a victory but in the meantime, good description by the way, there was a battle to be fought with their stuff. We can learn from them, not just the conclusions they reached in the end but from the insights gained along the way.
I outlined the book into three sections. You'll recognize these, they are Love God, Love People and Live Out. If we are going to live out we must learn to love God and love people. That requires a certain amount of heath, mentally, spiritually and relationally. Jesus said to love God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength and to love your neighbor as yourself (Matt. 22:37, 38). That's almost impossible to do if you haven't dealt with your stuff, otherwise what we call "love" looks a lot like your stuff foisted on others. The biblical heroes can teach us alot about getting right with God and right with others so they could live out in a healthy, godly way. Here is how I laid it out:
Love God
Moses - He saw himself as a misfit, a guy who couldn't get it done, but he learned to believe God and to see himself as God saw him. With trust in God's power he went back to face the place where he murdered and ran. The man who didn't see himself as a leader stood up to Pharaoh, the most powerful man on earth. He learned to play the tapes of his life forward to become the man God called him to be.
Abraham - He was a people pleaser. He gave Lot the best land. He was afraid to say Sarai washis wife, because he feared for his life. He gave in when Sarai wanted him to take Hagar as his concubine. But he learned to place his faith in God's way and God's timing. When his learnings were tested he demonstrated faith to offer his son Isaac back to God believing God could bring him back to life. God considered his faith righteousness and he is considered today the father of the faithful.
Paul - We like to focus on the victories of Paul but he was also a man who prided himself on keeping the law. He described himself as a Pharisee of the Pharisees. It is not hard to see he wrestled with legalism. Behind this kind of hypervigilence to keep the beach ball under water is usually a person who wrestles with the flesh in a powerful way. There is no way to know if he was OCD but he does give us some clues to what could have been addictive behavior when he says in Romans 7 (read the whole chapter), the things I want to do I don't and the things I don't want to do I do. He talks about a "thorn" in the flesh. If it was a physical thing he would have just called it what it was. He struggled with something he didn't want to name. But God taught him to lean into grace with such victory that he could boldly proclaim His grace is sufficient--when I'm weak, that's when I'm really strong. We can learn a lot from Paul.
Love People
Joseph - Joseph learned betrayal early in life. His brothers threw him into a pit and later sold him as a slave. Once he got back on his feet in Egypt he was again betrayed br Potipher's wife. He was even forgotten in prison by the butler. However, when he got the chance to reconcile, he did. But it wasn't all smooth. He manipulated before he trusted. He threw Simeon in jail. Do you suppose it was Simeon who pushed him in the pit? He played games to test his brothers before finally choosing to trust God and self disclose his identity. He helped them see that although they meant it for harm God used it for good.
David - When his brothers went to fight Goliath they didn't consider that their youngest brother should even be on the scene. But at the same they thought he had a big head. Do you thing David felt the need to prove himself? I don't think that need disappeared when he defeated the giant. His fighting spirit became the theme of songs sung about him. He flipped out when a nobody named Nabal dissed him. Why did that matter? Once he was king and he subdued all his enemies the desire for conquest didn't leave him. When the armies went out to battle he stayed home and that's when he turned to a different kind of conquest; he had an affair with Bathsheba. Why did he always need more? Good question, we'll look into that. We do know that in the end God said David was a man after his own heart. Evidently David did some good heart work concerning how to direct the passion in his life.
Job- Job had it all, a great family, wealth and health then he lost it all through no fault of his own. He went into grief at such a deep level that he clearly illustrates how to travail through shock, denial, bargaining, loss, despair, and depression. He turns to others and finds judgment even his wife tells him to curse God. He cries out for justice and for an advocate. He questions God and eventually chooses humility. Once he reaches acceptance he is on his way to developing a new normal. He even forgives his friends and prays for them. In the end God restores what he lost. Things would never be the same but in some ways they were better.
Live Out
John the Baptist appeared to have it all figured out. He preached and drew crowds who were so powerfully affected by the message that they wanted to be baptized. Even the Romans were drawn to listen and repent. His message was that judgment is coming! I bet he liked that message. It validated that he was right, the one who lived in the dessert on locusts and honey, who wore odd clothes and likely drew mocking stares in his early adulthood. He was right after all. Or was he? When he was thrown in jail it was this same preacher who sent his disciples to see if Jesus was really the One. What was that about? It was John who introduced Jesus. But John didn't see his story ending in jail. They were supposed to win; to defeat the oppressors. And then there was Jesus, who spent his time giving grace to sinners, feeding people, teaching about God's love, this couldn't possibly jive with the message of repentance and judgment or could it? Jesus answer illustrates the beauty of the kingdom of God that divinely balances justice and grace. The way Jesus answered John's disciples and what he said about John afterward indicate He knew John would get it. I pray you and I get it too.
Esther Can you imagine what it would be like to live always having to hide your identity? She was a Jew and her rise to prominence depended on her secret being hidden from her husband the king. However she finds herself in a dilemma, just like we usually do when we try to hide a secret about who we are--she can protect herself or reveal her past and perhaps save others. She was born for a time such as this-a kiros moment. She chose well when she said, I'm going to reveal myself and if I die, I die but I'm going to attempt to give life to others. What a great choice. We'll talk about our own kiros moments. Will you hide your secrets or reveal what leads to life?
Peter loved attention, the spotlight, the leader's role and he knew what was best. If you doubted that he would tell you so even if you were the Messiah. Peter didn't want Jesus to suffer. He thought they should built a temple on the mount. He cursed and denied Jesus three times when he didn't get his way at Jesus trial. He was so discouraged that he didn't have it figured out right he went into hiding and didn't support Jesus at the cross. Can anyone spell control issues? No wonder when Jesus reconfirmed his commitment beside a fire He asked Him three times if he loved Him and if He did then He was to feed the sheep and take care of the little lambs. Those are the jobs of a servant. Peter would give the rest of his life as a servant leader and in so doing he would become the leader of the church. He was made for that but first he had to learn to deal with his stuff. To fulfill God's plan he had to have his natural gifts sanctified by trial and fire. It is no wonder he wrote about that in the book we call 1 Peter.
You and I can learn to live out our faith and take our place alongside the heroes of our faith if we will let God redeem our stuff. We can stop coping and start healing if we are willing to let the Master Gardner pull up what He didn't plant in the garden of our life. Don't be afraid of what you will find on this journey, once you acknowledge what needs healing you are one BIG step closer to being free to live the life you were created to live.
More to come later when I start working on the chapters.
Gary Kendall
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